Day 6, #theSW30 challenge


First answer: Totally!

How I mean is, the kind of person that you are translates into how often you date and eventually, the kind of love life that you have.

However, life is not in ‘absolutes’. Despite being a warm person, life does throw its challenges: you may have opened your heart totally, and the one you loved decided not to go further. Or you may have been terribly betrayed. Situations like this may cause you to be less open to an active love life. And you won’t always have the kind of love that you want – because you become reserved.

But yes, our personalities and past experiences colour our perceptions, and this carves our love lives.

The common denominator across all our relationships is US. We choose the men we allow into our lives: the men who treat us right; the men who are dating us on the sly; the men who hurt us by not showing enough care or by insane jealousy; the men we choose that share a recurring theme…

Again, we may have chosen good men, given our very best and all to the relationship, did everything right, but it still wasn’t enough and the relationship ended, hurting us and colouring our outlook.

Again, we are responsible for how quickly we permit ourselves to heal. And how quickly we welcome the (genuine and true, we hope) attentions of another man, for the vibes we put out….

That said, I had struggled with putting up this post because I felt something was incomplete. I couldn’t quite explain how to say a woman determines her love life BUT it will not always be in her hands. Then I saw a Facebook post, and then I thought ‘haha, here’s it!’

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Now, as much as a woman wants a particular man, a particular love-life, no matter how humble she is, no matter how sexy, no matter how much make-up she puts up, or how so very virtuous she is, if the man is NOT willing to stay, he won’t.

And in that regard, a woman does NOT have the love life that she wants, despite having possibly giving her best to what she wanted.


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